Ten Practical Tips for the First-Time Caregiver
Living and Caring for a Person with Alzheimer's or Dementia
Jul 22, 2009
Statistics indicate as many as 5.3 million Americans live with Alzheimer’s. The disease destroys brain cells, causing problems with memory, thinking and behavior. Alzheimer’s gets worse over time and is fatal. According to the Alzheimer’s Association, it is the seventh-leading cause of death in the United States.
Cool and Calm Demeanor
Keep a calm demeanor under all circumstances. People with dementia or Alzheimer’s can and will pick up on the emotions of people around them and mimic those emotions. Agitation and anger can easily be imitated.
Avoid Arguments With Alzheimer's Patient
Never argue with or challenge a person with Alzheimer's. Do not ask: "Why did you do that?" A person suffering from Alzheimer’s or dementia cannot assess why they did something. Avoiding arguments can sidestep anxiety and confusion that can easily manifest itself.
Keep a Routine
Have the same meals together every day. Go out shopping on the same day each week to the same place. A routine may provide structure and can work successfully for years depending on the severity and advancement of the illness.
Reminisce About the Past With Patient
Talk about the past. Keeping them mentally and emotionally engaged is key to maintaining contentment. This also helps fight off the “sundowning” that can appear in late afternoon or early evenings. Sun downing is typically characterized by varying levels of paranoia and anxiety that appear regularly every day. In some instances, engaging a loved one in conversations about their past can ward off the onset of sun downing.
Maintaining Independence
As a caregiver, the inclination may be to do everything. Allow patients to do as much as they are physically able to do for as long as they can. It doesn’t matter if it’s perfect or not. Just allowing them to continue to do things that are relevant will keep them engaged. Keep them involved in real life things such as going to the store. They are retreating into themselves as this devastating illness takes hold. Help them maintain a feeling of empowerment and independence for as long as possible.
Family and Friends Network
Create a network of family and friends to help with caregiving duties. This may prove challenging. Be bold and tell people exactly what is needed. In most cases, people either don't understand or really can't face dealing with Alzheimer's or dementia. In either case, create a support system that is large and flexible.
Focus on "Right Now"
The only thing that makes any difference to the person with Alzheimer's is the "right now". Yesterday, last night, this morning and 30 minutes ago don't matter. All they know is the "right now." Accept it. It will be this way for as long as you are a caregiver.
Take Time for You
Take time for yourself! One of life's greatest challenges is to become a caregiver to the person who raised, nurtured and guided one into adulthood. It’s unnatural in the order of life. Come to terms with this and accept it. Know that as a caregiver, you are doing the very best for your loved one.
Little Victories
Embrace the little victories – the days (or moments in some cases), where your parent or loved one remembers things. Surrender to these moments as they happen.
Keep Photographs Handy
Pictures represent a window to the past. Keep them nearby and go through them with your parent or loved one frequently. Photographs can trigger amazing memories, some perhaps long forgotten. Point out and name family members and friends so that it does not become an exercise in anxiety.
Alzheimer’s does not define the entire life of the person it has chosen. That life is still viable, still important and still holds a special place in this world. Implement these practical tips and the journey will be a little easier.
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